Room 101: George Chuter – Leicester hooker

1. The Rolling Stones
This really pains me. I’m a HUGE Stones fan. But I feel it has to be said that they’ve over-stayed their welcome. In their pomp, The Stones represented everything that is great about rock and roll – slamming guitar riffs, sublime drumming, beautiful lyrics and a reckless disregard for personal wellbeing.
Since the early Seventies, however, they have failed to produce anything musically fresh or new. Yet here we are, nearly 40 years on, and they are still touring. Their place in the Pantheon of the greatest music artists has long been secure, so why are we being subjected to the sight of a group of ageing men desperately trying to recapture the magic of old? How many ‘Last Ever Tours’ can there be? Money is the driving force I suppose.
However, I don’t know about you, but I prefer to remember Mick and Keef as they were, all arrogance, pout and rebellion. Much more rock ‘n’ roll than the current version, who would appear to be far more at home on the sofa with a nice cup of tea than performing at an open-aired concert in Hyde Park. Modern Rolling Stones get in room 101.
TRP verdict:  It gives us no satisfaction to say, ‘you’re in’!
2. British Summertime
What is the point in teaching our kids about the four seasons if we only have three, and they are exactly the same?! Call me old-fashioned, but when I was growing up we had four distinct seasons – autumn was when the weather turned a little chillier and the leaves fell off the trees; winter was cold and sometimes we had snow; spring saw a warmer spell with a few showers; summer was characterised by the warm weather, blue skies and long lazy days.
The last few years have seen a notable absence of summer. We’ve had the chill, snow and showers. But no sun. I dread to think what the Druids would have made of it. I expect they would have erected more Stonehenges and performed numerous human sacrifices to appease the Sun-God. Seriously, I play rugby with a lot of foreign guys, and I’m fed up telling them “English summers aren’t always this bad”.  As I write, we’ve just had a month’s -worth of rain in one day.
TRP verdict:  Who are we to rain on your parade, George? You’re in!
3. Law Tinkering
I can’t really think of a recent law change that has had its desired effect on the game. We’ve heard endlessly over the last few years about how rugby needs to appeal to the masses, how it needs to be more attractive to the spectators and how it needs to become more exciting.
At various times the scrum, maul and breakdown have come under scrutiny and laws have been devised by ‘experts’ to make these areas more consumer-friendly. Unfortunately, the results have largely been counter-productive. The scrum and breakdown have become a lottery, while the maul has gone the way of genuinely talented reality TV stars and is almost never seen. I’m sure a lot of time has been spent going over proposed new laws, but often, what looks good on paper does not translate well to real life.
Watching rugby matches from 10 or more years ago shows a game that was fast, furious, skillful and sometimes brutal. These things made rugby a real spectacle, and helped raise its profile in this soccer-dominated country. I sometimes feel we are drifting away from the foundations of the game in pursuit of something altogether different.
TRP verdict:  You’ve successfully fought the law-makers…you’re in again!