1. Lorries, especially overtaking ones
Without wanting to sound like Clarkson vs Caravans, over the last few years I have spent a fair bit of time on A-roads and motorways and I’d like to campaign against lorries being allowed on these routes between 6am to 6pm. It’s so frustrating when a lorry creeps past another one in what seems like an hour-long overtaking manoeuvre. Then, to compound it, they flash at each other and ‘wink’ with their fancy indicators to let each other know they have successfully annoyed at least 30 drivers. Apparently they can do what they want because they are in a 30-tonne lorry with a self-proclaimed nickname on the front.
TRP verdict: Truck (and trailer) can definitely go into Room 101.
2. Flat Pack Furniture
Again, appealing to the masses I’ve gone with a pet hate, and current foe. It is regularly assumed that being a bloke I’m bound to be good at DIY. The reality is I’m terrible – as any of my family would happily testify, and regularly do. With my second child on the way I’ve had to prepare for another bout of ‘nesting’ which involves putting furniture together. This was (and still is) a complete nightmare. The evil manufacturers of flat pack furniture must take huge satisfaction in putting the bare minimum of detail in their instructions that are there to supposedly help you put together 300 pieces of kit. Honestly, my two-year-old could draw better diagrams! Inevitably this means I put at least one unit on the wrong way, a segment on upside down and have three suspicious screws left over. I don’t even want to start on Allen keys.
TRP verdict: Screw this for a laugh. You’re in again.
3. Advantage abuse
I believe the advantage law is one of rugby‘s treasures but is hugely underused – not by officials but players. To see a player deliberately knock on or attempt a drop-goal when the chances of scoring are highly improbable is a complete waste of an opportunity in my book. How exciting would it be to see an in-goal spiral bomb from five yards out or a trick kick or pre-planned special play performed in the knowledge that, at worst, a three point penalty kick is almost guaranteed. Teams could even look to bring back the ‘penalty wall’ move that every self-respecting school team had in the 90’s!
TRP verdict: It’s advantage Vickerman – 3/3!